The past few weeks have been emotionally challenging for me. I'm finally feeling like I'm picking myself back up. 🥰 I'm setting some new goals for myself to get rid of bad habits, and replace them with good ones. I fully intend on taking it easy this weekend and face the week head-on, not allowing it to put me back down.
❤ M O T I V A T I O N ❤
Oh, by the way! How do you like this look? This is something I did last year, but only recently found the photos again. I was exploring the dark academia aesthetic, but it looks more like Marceline from Adventure Time. 😅 (I love Marceline though. She's one of my favourite vampires in pop culture. 🥰)
My worst internship experience - Part 2
(for the previous part of the story, click here.)
I'm still seventeen in this part. Still new to the professional world, barely an adult, and having very little experience with... everything. I felt weird about this internship, but never said "no" when something was asked of me. I thought it was all part of the job, all part of the professional world. But I know better now.
Miss S is giving me more tasks to do, such as getting 30-40 cans of soda from the grocery store to fill up our vending machine. And in case you don't see the issue with this task; 30-40 cans of soda is heavy. I'm a small girl, barely weighing 55kg, and I have to carry 20-30kg worth of soda on my own. The plastic bag I used would dig into my skin as I try to carry it back to the company, awkwardly waddling and crossing a busy street.
This ordeal has actually damaged my skin, and while it doesn't leave scars or anything, I would have to do this same task every 2-3 weeks.
I didn't want to complain about it and tried to turn it into something positive. Like, hey, at least my muscles are getting a work-out now. All I do is sit on my arse all day anyway.
On another day, Miss A handed me a huge blue trash bag with clothes in it. "Bring it to the laundromat," she said. This bag contained her clothes. I am literally doing her house holding chores now. And again, I was internally questioning everything about this situation, but never vocalised my concerns because of how she reacted last time.
Like a dog, I carried this huge bag to the laundromat... only to find that the place was closed. I looked through the window, checked opening hours, and while they were scheduled to be open the door was locked. Ashamed and scared I returned to Miss A with the bag still in my arms, and she was not happy.
I am still wondering why I didn't say something back then, even while I was fully aware that the way she treated me is not right. She was clearly guilt tripping and gaslighting me the entire time I was there, and my scared butt stayed put right where she wanted me. 😖
This company was located in an area I was not familiar with. I had an old Samsung phone on which Google Maps barely worked and I had very little data to work with if I didn't have Wi-Fi. Going to the locksmith, grocery store, and laundromat was easy because it was all located in the same street. However, there came a point where Miss A asked me to get something that was slightly outside of this area.
She wanted me to buy mint, but used a word in a language that I wasn't familiar with. And even when I Googled said word, I couldn't figure out what it was. My dumb head didn't bother to ask her for clarification, and out I went.
I anxiously tried to navigate myself to this store where they only really sold fruits, vegetables, and herbs. It was already getting dark at this point and the streets were getting quiet. I still didn't quite know where I was going and took longer than I should have if I knew the area at all.
Miss A called me, impatient and asking where I was. I was in tears already but tried to hide it, saying that I didn't know where the store was. She huffed, puffed, and gave me an attitude saying "It's not that difficult, it's on XYZ street."
I just nodded, said "Yes, ma'am." and continued my search. Eventually, I did find the store, and asked the owner for the mint, using the word that Miss A gave me. Apparently, I pronounced it poorly and it took the store owner a few times before they realized what I meant. They literally went "Oh! You need mint! Why didn't you just say so?"
I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and I honestly just wanted to die right there when I realised what I was buying. I was also quite annoyed that Miss A didn't just say "mint" instead of using this complicated word I couldn't pronounce. I left the store with the mint, bawling my eyes out and I walked back to the company...
This story will be concluded in the next part. Somewhere in this story, this internship turned into a part-time job for me. I worked only 1 day a week on Saturdays, since I couldn't handle much more with college on the side. This wasn't my first part-time job, but I definitely had higher hopes for it...
I am grateful for...
the education I received. School is definitely important to some degree, and it differs for everyone. I am grateful for the knowledge that was given to me.
This week's song:
Question of the week:
What's something you're always in the mood for? Could be food, a movie, a game, etc.
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